Choosing Solitude

Humans evolved to live in small kin groups, eating together, sharing stories, and gossiping about Brad’s dirty little extra-marital affair with Lisa in accounting. We aren’t meant to be alone. Yet…

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Decision making 101

Have you ever remained in an indecisive state for days, months even years? Unable to feel sure about any option on the table, humming and hawing about the pros and cons and swaying back and forth about what to do?

I´m guessing that most of us including me can relate to this. Perhaps we are just not convinced either way and nothing feels right, or perhaps fear is holding us back from making a decision. More often than not making a decision means change and change means stepping out of our comfort zone and taking risks.

It is perfectly human to resist change! However, life is about growth not about standing still and growth happens when we make decisions! Maybe it is about moving to a new house or a new job, changing careers or dealing with a conflict at work. There are countless scenarios which are unique for every one of us.

But wouldn’t it feel so wonderful and empowering to actually make the decision and release the weight of feeling constantly indecisive?. Wouldn’t it feel like you had more control of your future rather than just drifting along? I think you know the answer!

So what’s the best way to finally make that decision?

Write about it: Write out the scenario and your choices. Write out the pros and cons of each decision but more importantly write down how you feel about both options. How does it feel in your body when you imagine yourself taking Decision A or Decision B? Do you feel relief or excitement, or do you feel a knot in your stomach? Remember that making no decision is also a choice, so evaluate how you feel about not making any decision as well!

Talk about it: Share your thoughts on the decision you are considering with a trusted supportive friend. Perhaps even two trusted supportive friends. Be careful that you choose someone who will not be overly critical or negative. He or she needs to be a good listener and hopefully give you helpful advice. Sometimes, just having someone listen to you helps you clear your head and figure out what you want to do.

Visualize it: Ask yourself how you visualize your life one year from now or five years from now. What do you want your life to look like? Imagine in detail what your best life looks like to help you make the best decision now.

Research it: Make an informed decision based on finding out as much as you can. Talk to experts, google information, read articles. The more information you have the more informed you will be which will make decision making just a little bit easier!

Come to a decision and stick to it: Feel confident that you are making the best choice available to you in this moment. Then start taking action steps to move forward.

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